The Process. Part I. Bummed.

There's no other way to describe it...bummed...it's taking him. I was scared today. Scared that I wouldn't know what to do if he really needed me. He's so fragile. He's on the verge...and I'm so heartbroken. I know I need to take this opportunity to tell him all the things I feel, but I think that would take another lifetime. He and I are kindred spirits. I am proud to call him my grandfather and my friend. Losing him is losing a part of myself...a part of my heart...a piece of my soul. I will miss him dreadfully. He hasn't left me yet, but it is really difficult seeing him like this. He wears his bald head well...but it breaks my heart that I can't do anything. I'm helpless...sitting idle by his side, watching, waiting, fearing, screaming, holding on so fucking tight...to do nothing...but love him. And that's all I can do. Forever.